1
00:00:00,869 --> 00:00:02,110
Oh, it's from Drew.

2
00:00:03,710 --> 00:00:07,990
It's a PBS tote bag.

3
00:00:08,250 --> 00:00:11,050
Oh, nice, Drew. You get that free for
the minimum donation.

4
00:00:12,270 --> 00:00:14,090
No, you get that when you buy the watch.

5
00:00:16,090 --> 00:00:17,890
Hey, I got the three tenors.

6
00:00:18,550 --> 00:00:19,830
I don't know what was in there. Give me
that.

7
00:00:21,150 --> 00:00:22,810
I mean, uh, congratulations.

8
00:00:24,250 --> 00:00:28,450
This one got separated from the gift.
I'm still looking for it. It's from

9
00:00:28,930 --> 00:00:31,870
Well... Wherever it is, thanks, Kate. My
pleasure. Congratulations.

10
00:00:32,549 --> 00:00:33,550
Yay.

11
00:00:33,870 --> 00:00:35,030
What did you get her?

12
00:00:35,370 --> 00:00:37,950
A card with a piece of wrapping paper
taped to the back.

13
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:41,250
Wow.

14
00:00:41,710 --> 00:00:43,610
Next office party, I'm going in on a
gift with you.

15
00:00:43,870 --> 00:00:46,930
Hey, it's my fifth wedding shower this
month for someone I barely know.

16
00:00:47,210 --> 00:00:48,570
Where's the party for single people?

17
00:00:48,790 --> 00:00:51,830
Just once, I'd like to blow out the
candles on a yes, I'm not pregnant cake.

18
00:00:52,150 --> 00:00:54,790
Easy, Kate. I don't want to save some of
that bitterness for your 40s.

19
00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:58,240
Q, can I talk to you? I was just going.

20
00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:01,260
Kate, you know, I could never find that
gift you gave me for my baby shower.

21
00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:04,720
Oh, it was that thing they jump.

22
00:01:04,980 --> 00:01:07,100
You know, walk, run, eat in. The toy.

23
00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:09,840
Oh, right.

24
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:11,320
Thanks.

25
00:01:13,100 --> 00:01:15,520
So what, buddy? How you doing? You gotta
fire me.

26
00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:18,840
What? Look.

27
00:01:19,470 --> 00:01:22,610
My wife's expecting any day now, and I'd
love to spend some time with her and

28
00:01:22,610 --> 00:01:26,570
the baby. We both know I'm not going
anywhere with this job. I mean, how long

29
00:01:26,570 --> 00:01:27,870
can a guy stay in women's shoes?

30
00:01:29,830 --> 00:01:30,830
Ha, ha, ha.

31
00:01:31,910 --> 00:01:34,770
Anyway, the only way I could afford to
do this is by collecting unemployment.

32
00:01:35,810 --> 00:01:38,090
That'd be great. You could show up for
your kid's career day with a beer and a

33
00:01:38,090 --> 00:01:39,090
TV guy.

34
00:01:40,030 --> 00:01:43,050
Hey, if I still had paternity leave, I
wouldn't have to ask you for this.

35
00:01:43,570 --> 00:01:44,570
So what do you say?

36
00:01:45,160 --> 00:01:48,300
There's rules, man. I could get in
trouble for this. I just can't go firing

37
00:01:48,300 --> 00:01:49,300
people willy -nilly.

38
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:51,000
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe. You're fired.

39
00:01:52,340 --> 00:01:53,760
How about if I had a bad attitude?

40
00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:55,620
Hey, the heck with you, buddy.

41
00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:00,480
Oh, man.

42
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,380
Look, I'll fire you for the kid.

43
00:02:04,300 --> 00:02:08,300
What if I just put down, uh, I don't
know, incompetence? Thanks.

44
00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:11,280
When did you have long hair?

45
00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:12,680
My mother.

46
00:02:17,450 --> 00:02:19,150
Watch it, pal. You're this close to
getting your job back.

47
00:02:21,310 --> 00:02:22,310
Congratulations, Ed.

48
00:02:22,790 --> 00:02:23,790
You're fired.

49
00:02:23,830 --> 00:02:26,650
Fired. All right. What do I tell my
wife?

50
00:02:27,530 --> 00:02:28,530
Wait, there's more.

51
00:02:28,710 --> 00:02:29,930
You only got six months to live.

52
00:02:33,090 --> 00:02:36,230
Moon over Parma, bring my love to me
tonight.

53
00:02:37,270 --> 00:02:40,430
Guide her to people underneath your
silvery light.

54
00:02:41,290 --> 00:02:44,930
We're going bowling, so don't lose her
in Solon.

55
00:02:50,030 --> 00:02:54,850
That's the way, uh -huh, uh, woo, I like
it, uh -huh, uh -huh. That's the way,

56
00:02:54,910 --> 00:03:00,190
uh -huh, uh -huh, woo, I like it, uh
-huh, uh -huh. Wow, fuzzy jello.

57
00:03:01,570 --> 00:03:06,930
Do a little dance, uh -uh, make a little
love, uh -uh, get down tonight, uh -uh,

58
00:03:06,950 --> 00:03:12,390
get down tonight. Oh, do a little dance,
uh -uh, make a little love, uh -uh, get

59
00:03:12,390 --> 00:03:14,650
down tonight, uh -uh, get down tonight.

60
00:03:28,590 --> 00:03:29,990
flush you down a toilet 30 years ago?

61
00:03:31,230 --> 00:03:32,290
What did you do, buddy?

62
00:03:33,850 --> 00:03:35,530
I believe this belongs to you.

63
00:03:36,230 --> 00:03:37,230
Oh, man.

64
00:03:37,670 --> 00:03:39,110
Harley. Harley.

65
00:03:40,130 --> 00:03:41,130
Go home.

66
00:03:41,970 --> 00:03:42,970
Home.

67
00:03:43,490 --> 00:03:44,890
Harley. Home.

68
00:03:45,710 --> 00:03:46,950
Man, is he stubborn.

69
00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:50,270
This is the third time this week. You
said you were going to get a cage for

70
00:03:50,690 --> 00:03:54,430
You know, Drew, we try to be good
neighbors.

71
00:04:09,100 --> 00:04:10,580
That's just asking for lizards.

72
00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:13,660
I'm sorry, Jules. I'll keep that in
mind.

73
00:04:15,180 --> 00:04:17,779
Whatever happened to normal pets like
hamsters and bats?

74
00:04:38,570 --> 00:04:39,630
cock movie this damn house.

75
00:04:42,390 --> 00:04:43,790
So, what do you guys want to see
tonight?

76
00:04:44,310 --> 00:04:46,090
Anything but romance or Pauly Shore.

77
00:04:47,330 --> 00:04:49,270
I don't get it. What's wrong with
romance?

78
00:04:50,850 --> 00:04:51,910
Nothing's wrong with romance.

79
00:04:52,270 --> 00:04:55,510
I'll see a romantic movie as long as
there's blood and everybody gets blood

80
00:04:55,510 --> 00:04:56,510
at the end.

81
00:04:56,890 --> 00:04:58,750
Let's see, we got a couple choices here
then.

82
00:04:59,770 --> 00:05:03,990
Headless in Seattle or The Way We Were
Before You Blew Us Up.

83
00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:10,020
stop thinking about that party this
morning.

84
00:05:10,300 --> 00:05:12,920
Most of the girls I went to school with,
they're either married or getting

85
00:05:12,920 --> 00:05:14,900
married, and I guess it's starting to
kind of bug me.

86
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:18,040
Most of the guys I went to school with
are either fat or getting fat. You don't

87
00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:19,040
see me crying about it.

88
00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:22,480
Carry on.

89
00:05:23,580 --> 00:05:27,120
I don't think there's any special age
you have to get married. I mean, I think

90
00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:28,220
it's when you meet the right person.

91
00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:29,900
Please, I don't need a husband.

92
00:05:30,540 --> 00:05:31,540
I just want a wedding.

93
00:05:33,000 --> 00:05:34,080
I don't want a husband either.

94
00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:37,700
I just want someone to appreciate how
hard I work around this house. Oh,

95
00:05:40,200 --> 00:05:45,820
Get it. When I was a little girl, I saw
myself getting married in a big church

96
00:05:45,820 --> 00:05:48,860
filled with beautiful flowers, wearing a
white wedding dress.

97
00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:54,980
And I saw myself at the altar next to
David Cassidy.

98
00:05:56,140 --> 00:06:00,000
Kate, don't worry about it. I mean, look
at the Bride of Frankenstein. She got

99
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,000
married after she was dead.

100
00:06:01,340 --> 00:06:02,900
There's still hope for you.

101
00:06:04,420 --> 00:06:05,480
You know what?

102
00:06:05,740 --> 00:06:07,280
You're right. Here I am...

103
00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:09,540
sitting with my friends, feeling sorry
for myself.

104
00:06:09,900 --> 00:06:11,940
I could do this at home. Sure. Bye.

105
00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:14,680
Hey, Kate.

106
00:06:16,940 --> 00:06:18,280
Hey, uh, you sure you're okay?

107
00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:19,560
Yeah, I'm fine.

108
00:06:19,860 --> 00:06:22,120
Boy, she's really out of her mind with
this whole wedding thing.

109
00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:23,560
I mean, I want to get married.

110
00:06:24,380 --> 00:06:25,380
In theory.

111
00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:27,980
You know, we all want to get married in
a perfect world.

112
00:06:29,280 --> 00:06:30,280
Marriage is great.

113
00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:31,880
Hypothetically.

114
00:06:33,860 --> 00:06:34,900
We're all scared, kid.

115
00:06:35,630 --> 00:06:37,450
Anybody who says different's a damn
liar.

116
00:06:40,810 --> 00:06:44,770
Stop that. You're freaking me out.

117
00:06:46,050 --> 00:06:47,410
We're talking about Kate here.

118
00:06:47,790 --> 00:06:49,450
Oh, she's just freaked out about the
ceremony.

119
00:06:50,070 --> 00:06:51,390
I don't even think about the ceremony.

120
00:06:52,010 --> 00:06:55,110
Except when I was dating Jackie, we did
actually talk about getting married in

121
00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,330
the flower garden in her parents'
backyard.

122
00:06:57,230 --> 00:07:00,930
And then, you know, later on when we
could afford it, we'd have a real

123
00:07:00,930 --> 00:07:01,930
in Vegas.

124
00:07:02,770 --> 00:07:04,870
You know, Elvis impersonated her.

125
00:07:05,230 --> 00:07:06,230
The whole shebang.

126
00:07:07,330 --> 00:07:09,270
Between you and Kate, you two should get
married.

127
00:07:10,090 --> 00:07:13,350
Hey, you know, when I was in college,
there was this fraternity that used to

128
00:07:13,350 --> 00:07:16,410
this shotgun wedding party every spring.
Man, I'm telling you, it was huge.

129
00:07:16,910 --> 00:07:18,230
It was like a big gag ceremony.

130
00:07:18,490 --> 00:07:21,330
Kate would be the center of attention.
Boy, she'd love it. It's perfect. I

131
00:07:21,330 --> 00:07:22,410
really cheer Kate right up.

132
00:07:23,110 --> 00:07:26,230
Okay, all we need is a wedding dress,
some handcuffs, and some flowers.

133
00:07:26,450 --> 00:07:28,070
Hey, I got all that stuff in my trunk.

134
00:07:30,770 --> 00:07:33,710
And Drew is the lucky groom. You get to
provide your own tux.

135
00:07:34,500 --> 00:07:36,360
Oh, man, maybe I could fit it in my prom
tux.

136
00:07:37,180 --> 00:07:38,180
I'd like to wear it once.

137
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:46,000
Hi,

138
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:47,800
Mimi. Hi, Pig.

139
00:08:03,530 --> 00:08:05,010
Don't tell me. Baby pictures.

140
00:08:05,250 --> 00:08:08,050
Hey, can't get enough of those because,
you know, babies look so different.

141
00:08:08,550 --> 00:08:10,210
No pictures, Drew. I got a problem.

142
00:08:10,730 --> 00:08:14,050
Well, you know, if you're having trouble
coming up with a name, I did fire you,

143
00:08:14,070 --> 00:08:16,270
you know. I never gave him a name. Chan.

144
00:08:16,710 --> 00:08:18,770
After the guy my wife had an affair
with.

145
00:08:18,990 --> 00:08:20,950
What? The baby's Chinese.

146
00:08:21,710 --> 00:08:24,790
And your wife isn't? Are you kidding?
She won't even eat man -turned -oranges.

147
00:08:26,270 --> 00:08:29,830
I'd love to help you, but I put my butt
on the line for you the first time. I

148
00:08:29,830 --> 00:08:31,070
just can't go back there and undo it.

149
00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:35,440
Fine, Mr. Rules Guy. If you need me,
I'll be living in a cardboard box.

150
00:08:35,679 --> 00:08:37,580
If I'm not there, try the gun shop.

151
00:08:37,799 --> 00:08:39,520
After that, just watch the news.

152
00:08:40,919 --> 00:08:41,919
Oh, hey, wait a minute.

153
00:08:42,260 --> 00:08:47,540
I'll see what I can do. No promises,
okay, but I'll... Look, I spend a lot of

154
00:08:47,540 --> 00:08:50,580
time talking to my employees about their
problems, and what happened to you

155
00:08:50,580 --> 00:08:51,580
isn't so out of the ordinary.

156
00:08:52,020 --> 00:08:55,280
I mean, sure, you gave up a job you
didn't have to, and your wife had

157
00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:56,280
else's baby.

158
00:08:57,660 --> 00:08:59,520
Well, we'll see you around, buddy.

159
00:09:03,950 --> 00:09:04,849
Where's Kate?

160
00:09:04,850 --> 00:09:07,690
Man, this is going to be great. She's in
the bridal department putting on the

161
00:09:07,690 --> 00:09:10,590
dress. She thinks I'm driving her to a
catalog photo shoot.

162
00:09:11,430 --> 00:09:12,430
How'd you get the dress?

163
00:09:12,770 --> 00:09:15,650
Same way I got the big screen TV from
when Saved by the Bell went to France.

164
00:09:17,950 --> 00:09:19,870
I bought it and I'm taking it back
tomorrow.

165
00:09:22,110 --> 00:09:23,110
Oh, hello.

166
00:09:24,910 --> 00:09:25,910
Dive, dive.

167
00:09:26,470 --> 00:09:27,470
Get out, babe.

168
00:09:28,270 --> 00:09:30,290
I'm so lucky that mom got sick.

169
00:09:30,770 --> 00:09:32,730
So I'll teach her to eat twice in one
day.

170
00:09:59,070 --> 00:10:01,630
Boy, am I glad I didn't tell you guys I
wanted a baby.

171
00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:06,410
What are you looking at? You ever saw a
bride in handcuffs walk down the aisle

172
00:10:06,410 --> 00:10:08,550
of the Polka Music before? Where the
hell have you been?

173
00:10:09,390 --> 00:10:10,770
Hey, look at me, I'm getting married.

174
00:10:12,270 --> 00:10:15,510
Before we begin, one quick announcement.
The happy couple has made their

175
00:10:15,510 --> 00:10:19,390
selections in the Warsaw Tavern Bridal
Registry. Nothing in cans, bottles only.

176
00:10:19,670 --> 00:10:22,630
Also, if anyone's interested in an 84
Ford Escort, see me after.

177
00:10:23,550 --> 00:10:24,950
Padre, thank you.

178
00:10:25,930 --> 00:10:27,650
Marriage, the final frontier.

179
00:10:30,730 --> 00:10:34,570
not only to witness the humiliation of
our friend Kate, but hopefully sell a

180
00:10:34,570 --> 00:10:37,570
car. And who knows, maybe a used
snowblower.

181
00:10:38,110 --> 00:10:39,370
Fifty bucks, queen.

182
00:10:43,030 --> 00:10:48,290
Drew Carey, are you prepared to enter
into the state of holy acrimony with

183
00:10:48,290 --> 00:10:49,049
O 'Brien?

184
00:10:49,050 --> 00:10:51,270
To drink with her? To cleave to her?

185
00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:54,490
To boldly go where at least 20 or 30 men
have gone before?

186
00:11:06,860 --> 00:11:08,140
Are you prepared to wed Drew?

187
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:09,500
To bed Drew?

188
00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:13,480
To boldly go where no woman has gone
willingly without the promise of a free

189
00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:14,600
dinner or cold hard cash?

190
00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:17,840
I got worse.

191
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:23,200
20 or 30 guys.

192
00:11:37,390 --> 00:11:41,870
Will you please take Drew as is, no
refunds, all sales final, store credit

193
00:11:41,870 --> 00:11:42,870
receipt only?

194
00:11:43,650 --> 00:11:45,130
Do you have anything of my size?

195
00:11:46,650 --> 00:11:49,270
Is there any reason why these two should
not be joined together?

196
00:11:50,330 --> 00:11:51,330
Well,

197
00:11:51,570 --> 00:11:55,110
since there are no objections, I'd like
to remind the bride before we take the

198
00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:58,930
handcuffs off that we only did this to
make her happy, and it was all Drew's

199
00:11:58,930 --> 00:12:03,110
idea. With that said, I now pronounce
you drunk and disorderly.

200
00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:31,800
Never have too many of these.

201
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:33,980
Hey, honey, a little something for the
death.

202
00:12:36,740 --> 00:12:40,460
Oh, you're a lucky man, Drew Carey. You
really picked yourself a winner there.

203
00:12:40,620 --> 00:12:42,000
Yep, Kate cleans up pretty good.

204
00:12:42,480 --> 00:12:44,200
How do you think Kate's not married, for
real?

205
00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:45,640
Because she dates losers.

206
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,000
She's demanding.

207
00:12:47,080 --> 00:12:48,080
She's bossy.

208
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:50,200
She hits.

209
00:12:53,700 --> 00:12:54,700
I guess.

210
00:12:55,220 --> 00:12:57,900
You ever wonder why one of us never
marries Kate?

211
00:12:58,280 --> 00:13:00,120
Maybe like marrying your sister. Hey.

212
00:13:00,330 --> 00:13:01,330
Some countries, they do that.

213
00:13:03,050 --> 00:13:05,710
I always thought we were saving her, you
know, just in case.

214
00:13:06,530 --> 00:13:09,410
It's kind of weird, though, that none of
us ever dated her, especially you,

215
00:13:09,490 --> 00:13:10,490
Drew.

216
00:13:10,970 --> 00:13:13,550
I guess I was too busy fantasizing about
Oswald's mom.

217
00:13:15,210 --> 00:13:17,410
Yeah, your mom was hot. Shut up.

218
00:13:18,530 --> 00:13:20,470
Jazzercising in her little disco shorts.

219
00:13:20,690 --> 00:13:24,450
Yeah, well, maybe I watch your mom, too,
in her big polyester pantsuit, mowing

220
00:13:24,450 --> 00:13:25,450
the lawn.

221
00:13:27,950 --> 00:13:31,360
Well, I guess that's... the reason why
we never dated Kate. How about you?

222
00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:32,680
She knew me too well.

223
00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:35,860
But I did carry her eighth grade picture
around with me on my wallet.

224
00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:37,740
I told everybody she was my girlfriend.

225
00:13:38,360 --> 00:13:40,960
It was kind of sweet back then, but now
I get the weirdest looks.

226
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:45,280
I had that picture with the lip gloss,
the mouth slightly parted.

227
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:47,360
Eighth grade was a good year for Kate.

228
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:48,720
You

229
00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:55,760
know

230
00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:56,760
why none of us ever dated Kate?

231
00:13:56,980 --> 00:14:01,660
No. Because she never... show the
slightest romantic interest in any of

232
00:14:01,660 --> 00:14:03,180
don't know. I kissed her once.

233
00:14:04,300 --> 00:14:06,000
What? I did. Grade six.

234
00:14:06,260 --> 00:14:07,620
She had mono and she dared me.

235
00:14:09,620 --> 00:14:10,620
Still counts.

236
00:14:13,940 --> 00:14:17,380
I, uh... I saw Kate naked once.

237
00:14:18,100 --> 00:14:19,100
Get out of here.

238
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:20,820
How much did a thing like that cost you?

239
00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:24,100
Nothing. She was 16.

240
00:14:24,680 --> 00:14:25,680
16?

241
00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:29,760
Yeah, we were up in her house, up in her
bedroom, and bam, she changed right in

242
00:14:29,760 --> 00:14:30,760
front of me. Wow.

243
00:14:31,020 --> 00:14:32,020
I have a theory.

244
00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:33,160
Is she real hairy?

245
00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:38,880
Well, she wasn't then. The point is, she
changed in front of me like I wasn't

246
00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:39,880
even there.

247
00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:43,180
That's when I realized she didn't even
see me as a guy. Ah, that's got to hurt.

248
00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:44,320
Yeah, sorry, man.

249
00:15:02,570 --> 00:15:03,570
Do that at Grandpa's funeral.

250
00:15:05,970 --> 00:15:07,490
Why'd you guys do all this anyway?

251
00:15:07,930 --> 00:15:10,290
Well, you know, he seemed kind of
depressed about having a wedding and

252
00:15:10,290 --> 00:15:12,770
we figured a little public humiliation
is just what the doctor ordered.

253
00:15:13,470 --> 00:15:14,470
You're the best.

254
00:15:14,710 --> 00:15:18,690
Are we really going to Morton's? I can't
wait to walk in looking like this.

255
00:15:18,930 --> 00:15:21,010
Yeah, hope I don't clash with the maitre
d's hair.

256
00:15:23,290 --> 00:15:28,310
Yeah, listen, um, us Walden Lewis were
kind of wondering why you never got

257
00:15:28,310 --> 00:15:30,670
serious with either of them. Or, you
know, any of us, really.

258
00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:32,280
Are you kidding?

259
00:15:33,380 --> 00:15:37,220
I totally would have. I just didn't want
to compete with Oswald's mom.

260
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,160
She had the serious hots for you and
Lewis.

261
00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:41,520
You did?

262
00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:44,720
Oh, my God, we were just talking
about... Oh, you're kidding.

263
00:15:47,820 --> 00:15:54,640
So, did any of you, you know, ever have
a little

264
00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:55,640
crush on me?

265
00:15:55,820 --> 00:15:57,240
Maybe, you know, when we were teenagers.

266
00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:01,640
And? And then we discovered my brother's
magazines and you became obsolete.

267
00:16:03,580 --> 00:16:04,580
Come on.

268
00:16:04,940 --> 00:16:08,240
We practically hung out together all the
time. You practically lived at my

269
00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:10,380
house. Yeah, maybe a little more than I
should have.

270
00:16:10,980 --> 00:16:11,980
What do you mean?

271
00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:16,500
Well, you know, there was that time you
changed your clothes right in front of

272
00:16:16,500 --> 00:16:17,399
me.

273
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:18,400
I did what?

274
00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:21,320
We were 16 and you changed right in
front of me like I was the chair.

275
00:16:22,260 --> 00:16:23,420
And I walked home crying.

276
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,140
No, no, don't feel bad.

277
00:16:27,050 --> 00:16:29,950
Then I wrote you a little letter, which
I accidentally mailed to my grandma.

278
00:16:32,090 --> 00:16:34,970
She wrote me back saying that she loved
me too, you know, but not in that way.

279
00:16:37,190 --> 00:16:39,450
Drew, I'm so sorry.

280
00:16:40,430 --> 00:16:43,730
Wow, you actually thought about me like
that.

281
00:16:44,110 --> 00:16:45,170
That's so weird.

282
00:16:45,670 --> 00:16:49,210
Oh, I don't know. I don't think it would
have been, you know, so bad if we'd

283
00:16:49,210 --> 00:16:51,130
actually done this. You know, gotten
together.

284
00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:57,080
Oh, my God.

285
00:16:57,200 --> 00:16:58,320
I've got hives.

286
00:16:58,740 --> 00:17:03,320
Oh, my God. You're covered with...
Driver, take us to Metro General right

287
00:17:04,060 --> 00:17:06,440
Hey, out of the way. We've got a sick
woman here.

288
00:17:11,619 --> 00:17:12,619
Hey,

289
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:25,060
Drew. I heard you got married last
night. Oh, no, not really. It was just

290
00:17:25,450 --> 00:17:26,450
I don't mind not being invited.

291
00:17:26,790 --> 00:17:29,450
I'm just glad a guy like you could find
somebody.

292
00:17:30,570 --> 00:17:31,570
Here.

293
00:17:31,790 --> 00:17:32,790
Hey, thanks.

294
00:17:32,950 --> 00:17:35,690
I'll invite you to the next one.
Shouldn't be too long. I gave the bright

295
00:17:35,910 --> 00:17:38,150
Just a piece of the merit stick. You
know, we're still looking for a toaster.

296
00:17:43,030 --> 00:17:44,030
Oh, Drew.

297
00:17:44,590 --> 00:17:47,430
What? I think I can help you with hiring
Ed back.

298
00:17:47,670 --> 00:17:48,990
There's an opening in sportswear.

299
00:17:49,230 --> 00:17:51,110
No, there isn't. There will be once you
fire Leslie.

300
00:17:52,050 --> 00:17:53,250
Leslie, who just had the wedding shower?

301
00:17:53,450 --> 00:17:54,450
She's on her honeymoon.

302
00:17:54,970 --> 00:17:59,170
Courtesy of Winford Louder. We caught
her on camera stealing cash and a bikini

303
00:17:59,170 --> 00:18:00,510
that I could use as an eye patch.

304
00:18:03,010 --> 00:18:05,610
Great, all you need is a hook hand and a
peg leg, the outfit will be complete.

305
00:18:06,990 --> 00:18:08,950
Here's the number of her hotel in Maui.

306
00:18:09,390 --> 00:18:11,590
Oh, man, I hate to ruin somebody's
honeymoon.

307
00:18:12,370 --> 00:18:13,370
Then don't get married.

308
00:18:16,630 --> 00:18:17,630
Drew?

309
00:18:19,790 --> 00:18:23,650
Drew, we've got to talk about my hives.
I know, I...

310
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:24,839
I feel terrible.

311
00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:27,020
Oh, God, Drew, you knew. Why didn't you
tell me?

312
00:18:27,300 --> 00:18:28,300
It just came out.

313
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:29,600
It's not what you think.

314
00:18:29,980 --> 00:18:31,980
What I think? What are you talking
about?

315
00:18:32,540 --> 00:18:33,540
What are you talking about?

316
00:18:35,140 --> 00:18:37,880
Formaldehyde. They found formaldehyde on
this dress.

317
00:18:38,300 --> 00:18:40,680
You know the stores will take anything
back policy?

318
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:44,300
No, I'm using it to trade whatever this
piece of crap is in for a toaster. Drew,

319
00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:48,260
someone bought that dress before you and
used it in a funeral.

320
00:18:48,940 --> 00:18:50,420
Oh, my God, that's horrible.

321
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:54,830
Then they sick and perverse ceremony
someone who would put a wedding dress on

322
00:18:54,830 --> 00:18:56,770
corpse has and returned it.

323
00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:58,770
Drew, the dress came back from the dead.

324
00:19:01,690 --> 00:19:03,150
Well, you know, it's not like she wore
it out.

325
00:19:04,930 --> 00:19:08,430
Hello? Person who wore the death dress
got hives from it here.

326
00:19:09,210 --> 00:19:10,650
I'm sorry. I'm so relieved.

327
00:19:11,630 --> 00:19:14,890
You'll never guess what I thought gave
you the hives.

328
00:19:15,650 --> 00:19:16,650
What?

329
00:19:16,770 --> 00:19:20,330
I thought it was from what I said to you
in the limo. You know, about us getting

330
00:19:20,330 --> 00:19:22,580
together. I didn't really mean what you
thought I meant.

331
00:19:23,300 --> 00:19:24,600
That's not what I thought you meant.

332
00:19:25,660 --> 00:19:30,220
It just kind of came out, you know. I'm
not... It's not like I've been waiting

333
00:19:30,220 --> 00:19:31,220
for you my whole life.

334
00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:33,520
I'm just waiting for that one great love
I haven't found.

335
00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:36,040
Yet. Yet.

336
00:19:38,200 --> 00:19:41,720
Drew, I should be so lucky to marry
someone like you.

337
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:43,640
But not you.

338
00:19:45,360 --> 00:19:48,100
I should be so lucky as to marry someone
like Anna Nicole Smith.

339
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:50,800
You know, but her.

340
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:56,740
So, uh, you never have to talk about
this again?

341
00:19:57,240 --> 00:19:58,240
I hope not.

342
00:19:58,900 --> 00:20:00,400
Good, because I'm starting to itch.

343
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,740
Now, uh, why don't you go do whatever
you undead do?

344
00:20:03,980 --> 00:20:05,120
I'm going to make a phone call.

345
00:20:05,400 --> 00:20:06,400
Later.

346
00:20:14,260 --> 00:20:15,480
Hello, Maui Sweets.

347
00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:17,280
Well, mahalo to you, too.

348
00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:20,100
Listen, I'd like to leave a message for
Miss Leslie Burke.

349
00:20:20,640 --> 00:20:21,640
You got a pen ready?

350
00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:22,880
Good.

351
00:20:22,940 --> 00:20:26,620
Dear Leslie, they say that vacations end
too soon.

352
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:28,320
Well, good news.

353
00:20:31,420 --> 00:20:32,600
Want to play a little Jeopardy?

354
00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:34,540
Winner gets to eat the loser.

355
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,200
Man, would you look at these categories?

356
00:20:39,300 --> 00:20:42,440
Flies, prehistoric history, protective
coloring.

357
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:47,350
No. You can't use my computer.

358
00:20:49,690 --> 00:20:50,690
I don't want to make out.